The Darkness Within

Of all the shoes I’ve owned, there’s one pair above all the rest that I think helped contribute to the development of the Morton’s Neuroma and these are the bad-ass mo-fos that squeezed my foot. If truth be known they are probably a size too small; I just had to have these boots even though a European 35.5 with that amount of pointy toe is probably a UK size two rather than a size three, and that laydeeez and gentlemen is a bit of an issue when you’re cramming your size three into them.

Even now though, after the pain they’ve inflicted I still adore these boots. Look at that heel though, I mean look……at……that……heel, and the buckles and the zips and the laces and the (way too) pointy toe. Hmmmmmmmm, these are the sort of boots that you’d see being licked by the servants of Lady Heather.

These are the boots I bought when I was blazing my way through the first season of True Blood; a programme where vampires really are vampires and sparkling is something that only happens in champagne. You see, I have a ‘thing’ about vampires, Dracula, Lestat, Angel, Blade, I’m not picky; in fact I’m a slut when it comes to vampire films, I’ll watch them all. I've even waded through Bram Stoker's novel and lowered myself to IDW Publishing's vampire comic books.

I think this fascination with the blood-suckers stems from the weekends I spent as a child with Lilian, my paternal Grandmother who allowed me to stay up way past the bed-time of any normal child. It was a reciprocal agreement, she ensured I didn’t spend the weekend playing with matches, sharp implements and snuff (hard drugs back then consisted of snuff and herbal tinctures) and in return I would keep her company when the Hammer House of Horrors or old MGM and Universal screamfests were on the old black and white tv. She didn’t change to colour until after the Royal Wedding of the 1980s and even then it was only because one of the valves had gone. It made Snooker from the Crucible an interesting viewing experience.

We’d sit up and watch all manner of bawdy trash at the weekend and I’d be mesmerised by the callousness of Dracula (Lugosi, Langella, Lee and Jourdan) and the eroticism of his ‘brides’; I’m not sure I got the erotic undertones at that early age, but there was certainly something about the flowing locks and voluptuous breasts that planted seeds of interest into my subconscious.

There’s just something about a good vampire film that draws me in, I think I may have an inner goth and these boots are a symbol of that dark heart seeking a form of expression; hell even Rhianna reckons it’s good being bad.

We haven't spent much time together me and these dominatrix boots but I remember that I first wore them to a friend’s Halloween party and admittedly felt a bit of a ‘crunch’ in my foot after wearing them for a couple of hours. I seem to remember having the neuroma twinge before the boots but I could be wrong. Alternatively I may just not want to blame them, how could I? They made me do it. Yes, Mistress Boots…….